No Longer Listening to Them...

In my town, I have a core group of 3 girlfriends. These are the girls my age who truly know me (and they still hang out with me!). Three of us have been best friends since the very first day of 7th grade and God added the 4th girl to the group in 10th grade. We’ve been through a lot in the last 7 years. The highs and lows of middle school and high school. School dances, football games, volleyball games and tournaments, lunches, classes, etc. I truly love these girls and my prayers for them are fervent. So what’s the problem? None of them are growing followers of Christ. One would claim to be a Christian, but she’s turned off to any “spiritual talk.” Another is so stuck on religion and the rules of legalism that she can’t see the amazing relationship God is offering her if she’d just take it. The third used to attend church regularly but the desire for independent growth just isn’t there. Also, based on many of the questions she’s asked me, the churches she has attended aren’t faithfully preaching the Word of God. They’re more concerned with having fun and drawing students in than teaching good, solid messages.

My lack of friends who are growing followers of Christ has bothered me for quite a while. Only God knows the number of times I have cried out to Him begging for just one Christian girlfriend my age who lives in the same town. (The “in the same town” is important because I do have a phenomenal Christian friend who now lives in the Dallas area. We stay in touch as much as possible through phone calls, Facebook messages, etc., but technology can only do so much.) I’ve experienced quite a long time of silence from God on this issue. Until this summer, that is. BUT, the answer was nothing like I hoped it would be.

They say as a Christian, the majority of your friends should be Christians. More specifically, they say that your friends should come from within your church. I don’t know who they are, but I’ve bought into their way of thinking for too long. Look at the perfect example – Jesus. Yes, He had his ministry peeps (a/k/a disciples), but he also hung out with tax collectors and “sinners.”

Now the tax collectors and “sinners” were all gathering around to hear him. But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”
Luke 15:1-2

If Jesus hung out with tax collectors and sinners, am I above hanging out with non-Christians? Certainly not.

This issue also brings up a long-running insecurity of mine. As part of buying into their way of thinking, I’ve wondered “What’s wrong with me?” As a result of being burned many times, I work hard to be genuine. The me you see at church is the same me you see in town, when I’m at school, or when I’m hanging out with my (non-Christian) friends. So when they say if you are a Christian, your friends should be Christians and this Christian doesn’t have Christian friends … well, it made wonder “Why?” The mysterious power of them made me feel like less of a Christian (which is totally absurd!) because of the friends God has appointed for me at this time.

The point is this – I trust Him. Apparently He has me with this group of girls for such a time as this for His purposes. Do I still long for a Christ-following friend to walk this journey with? Yes, but that’s not my focus anymore. I’m not going to discount the friends that have been with me for years just because they aren’t passionately pursuing Christ. My job is to shine His light with anyone I come into contact with.

This summer He has repeatedly shown me new things in this area and provided many opportunities to testify to His great faithfulness. It’s been eye-opening to see that Christians and non-Christians face many of the same issues but how we deal with them differs. I’m beyond thankful for the opportunities He’s given to share what’s going on in my life and to point to Him continually. That’s all I can do. If and when these girls choose to leave their current spiritual state and passionately pursue the God of the Universe who finds them captivating is not within my control. My job is this: love God, love others, be real, be honest, and share His goodness at every opportunity. The results are up to Him. THIS is my mission field. These are the girls He’s appointed me to pour myself into for His glory. May my life be evidence of His never-ending mercy and grace and may my love for Him overflow into all I come into contact with.